The night before Christmas

VISIONS OF SUPPLEMENTS DANCED IN MY HEAD


“Twas the night before Christmas
When all through the house
The vitamin bottles were plenty and close
There was A for my vision and good healthy skin
Ten thousand units should not do me in.
Cigarettes won’t harm me if I’m full of A
No fear of skin cancer—I’ll sun tan all day.
And vitamin D for good bones, of course
No fear of arthritis—I’m strong as a horse.
Sunshine and milk may give some people D
But the stuff in the bottle’s the potion for me.
Of vitamin E, I can’t get enough
From regular food—it’s not got the right stuff.
I’ll never go bald, will be virile and strong
With vitamin pills I’ll surely live long.
Of vitamin B, what more need I say
These little gems keep me stress-free all day.
Sure, studies may claim that it’s toxic and such
But those dietitians don’t know so much.
And here’s to my favourite, old vitamin C
The fighter of colds, the saviour of me.”

From my musings and dreaming
I woke with a start
To find myself facing
An elf with a cart.
The cart was just loaded
With food of all sorts
Carrots and oranges and milk by the quarts
Cranberries, turkey and even some cream
The elf then approached me as if in a dream.
“What do you want?” I cried with alarm
“Why, nothing , fairy lady, but to save you from harm”.
He picked up my bottle of wonderful pills
And asked if they’d save me from all of my ills.
“If vitamin B can alter your mood,
In the name of St. Nick, why not get it from food?”
Well then I had him—I was sure of my case
“Because, I said wisely, “real food’s just a waste.
It’s lacking in vitamins, minerals and stuff
The soil that it’s grown in is just so much fluff”

Well, he sprang to the table, chuckled “You silly twit—
That’s a load of malarkey, it just doesn’t fit.
The soil your food’s grown in has vitamins, sure.
If from synthetic fertilizers or loads of manure.
When nutrients are lacking the crops just won’t grow
They’re either full of the good stuff
Or they never show.
And not only that, he went on to explain
Those doses you’re taking might even cause pain.
The studies are clear and there’s nary a doubt
The more you take in, the more you’ll put out.
That’s if you’re lucky and don’t take excess
Since extra large doses can wreak quite a mess.

With one wave of his hand the bottles were gone
And food filled the counter as he whistled a song
“Let’s have no more nonsense, he said with a grin
If you’d be well nourished, here’s where to begin:
Veggies and fruits stand you in good stead;
Milk and milk products and whole grains and bread;
Lean meats and chicken and plenty of fish
Good health will be yours if that is your wish.
There’s plenty of science, as clear as yon star,
That those who eat well live longer by far.
Blueberries, strawberries, yogurt and nuts
Are chock-full of good stuff, no ifs ands or buts.
Salmon and mackerel have fun in the sea
Producing those fish oils for you and for me.
From beef we get iron and B 12 and such,
To our animal friends we all owe so much.
Beans and cereals are important for sure
Without these great foods, we’d be healthy no more.

Then laying a finger aside of his nose
The elf disappeared, but what do you s’pose
I heard him exclaim as he vanished from sight?
“Merry Christmas to all and you’d better eat right!”

All juiced up

Juices, both fruit and vegetable, have long been to the diet what scarves and jewelry are to a woman's wardrobe: accessories. Not really necessary, but something to complete or perk up the overall picture. This is unfortunate, although one must admit that there are a few people who view liquid calories as not counting...and are therefore apt to overdo it. Generally though, folks often dismiss the nutrient contribution that juices can make. Even worse, they sometimes relegate juices to the role of 'mixer' as has befallen Clamato juice. Does anyone drink it 'straight' without the helping hand of vodka? There are even people who believe that the sole reason for the existence of pineapple juice is to provide a thirsty world with an unending supply of Pina Coladas.

Grape juice of course, is consumed in vast quantities...but mostly in its fermented form, or jellied up and spread on a peanut butter sandwich. In short, the use and abuse of juice really ought to be examined and with the Christmas season upon us, I thought I'd draw your attention to this oft maligned beverage.

The least underrated of all of the juices would have to be that of the orange. But even our Floridian friend, or California cousin, suffers the squeeze of misunderstanding. While most are aware of the terrific vitamin C content of orange juice, few are aware of the great contribution ti can make to our daily intake of folic acid, pyridoxine and potassium. These as well as many other nutrients are imbibed with a glass of sunshine, a point which seems to be lost on those who feel that a glass of reconstituted orange 'drink' will pack the same nutritional punch. The only significant contribution the 'fakes' make is of vitamin C.

Another standby in the juice department is the tomato, which has been fortunate enough to escape being categorized as a breakfast drink only. Some, of course, wouldn't recognize it without a stalk of celery, but its low calorie content has put it on every dieter's list of dependables. It already contains more than enough sodium so don't add insult to injury by adding salt to it. Nutrient-wise it's another great source of vitamin C and makes a yeoman's donation of vitamin A. Phosphorus, potassium and magnesium are also well represented. Add clams (Clamato) or other vegetables (V8) and you get a variety of other nutrients as well.

For lovers of purple, grape juice is on the rise as a beverage of choice...and not too often sullied as a mixer for alcohol. It isn't a natural source of vitamin C, but most brands have this added. It does contribute a fair amount of potassium and its phenol content plus resveritrol has put it at the top of 'healthy' drinks for a possible role in lowering the risk of heart disease. Pineapple juice carries with it not only visions of swaying palm trees and white sands, but also a bounty of pyridoxine, thiamin, magnesium and copper. And while we're in the tropics why not consider some of the more exotic juices available to us. Though it's true that these are more expensive than the old traditionals, and there transportation uses a lot of fuel, it's also true that they provide nutrition and make a nice occasional treat.

Papaya juice offers vitamin C and vitamin A, a myriad of minerals and just a touch of elitism from knowing that this definitely separates you from the hoi polloi. Mango juice is also very pleasant and, again, a great provider of vitamins A and C. There are also the juices of the guava, pomegranate (currently a favourite of the health-food crowd), apricot nectar, cranberry juice and combinations of the above.

Suffice it to say fruit and vegetable juices can be a good source of nutritious pleasure and can provide a nice change for monotonous snacks. Given today's water-tight containers and assortment of thermoses they can be toted easily. But remember, they aren't great sources of calcium, so shouldn't be thought of as a replacement for milk. You don't need me to tell you that they're an infinitely better choice than a soft drink.

What's so good about leafy greens?

All right, feminists...sit up and take notice: it was a female investigator who discovered an important B vitamin--folacin, or folic acid, which is one of the biologically active forms. Dr. Lucy Wills became intrigued by a specific type of anemia among the pregnant women she was treating in India. Eventually she determined that these ladies were lacking something in their diet and that 'something' was called 'Wills Factor'. Finally the vitamin was extracted from spinach leaves and some clever devil came up with the name folic acid from the Latin 'folium' for leaf. Which is a handy way of remembering one of its excellent sources, if you can't or don't care to remember its best sources, liver and brewer's yeast. Brewers must be very healthy people, not to mention happy.

Time out for a little fun with chemistry. The technical name for folacin is pteroylglutamic acid, or PGA. This means that it's made up of pteroic acid along with one or more molecules of glutamate. I know you're gasping at this information--well hold on, it gets even better. The form that's used in food supplements has one glutamate molecule--a monoglutamate, which is very heat stable but most vulnerable if cooked in an acid solution. Meaning what? Meaning that you shouldn't add lemon juice when you're cooking greens. Another form of pteroic acid is para-amino benzoic acid, fondly referred to as PABA which, for those of you who love summer, will conjure up visions of beaches and sunscreen. PABA was originally thought to be a vitamin but we now know it's useless on the inside...meaning don't drink your sun-screening products.

Absorption of folacin is pretty routine except under certain conditions: amino salicylic acid and cyclosporin (drugs sometimes used in treating tuberculosis), some anticonvulsant medications, and alcohol diminish the level of absorption. As a matter of fact, the type of folacin that's found in food can't be absorbed by chronic alcoholics, forcing them to rely on a synthetic supplement, which I'm sure is high on their list of priorities. When you stop to think about it, there are so many vitamins whose absorption is impeded by alcohol, one can readily envision the day when the I.U.D. (International Union of Dissipators) stages massive protests to demand the vitaminization of booze. I jest, but I have it on good authority that Austrlia already requires the addition of thiamin to alcoholic beverages to ward off a condition (Wernicke-Korsakoff syndrome) in alcoholics.

Sex pops up in nutritional discussions as it does in just about everything, and we find that the use of many oral contraceptive pills will lower serum folic acid levels. So guys that would a-courtin' go would be well advised to bring spinach instead of flowers. Pregnancy, which sometimes occurs in people not taking the aforementioned birth-control pill, demands a lot from a woman...especially folic acid. So much so that it is definitely recommended for pregnant women. Even more important is ensuring adequate folic acid intake around the time of conception to reduce the risk of Spina Bifida in the baby. Anyone considering becoming pregnant would be wise to consider a folic acid supplement as well.

Now then, supposing you're not taking any medication, are a teetotaler and your folacin absorption is just fine, thank you very much, what does it do for you once you've got it? Basically it's involved in amino acid metabolism and the synthesis of nucleic acids. If you don't have enough of it, your red blood cell formation suffers. The major symptom or result of folic acid deficiency is megaloblastic anemia in which the red blood cells are very large, but not plentiful. Anyone on a normal, well-balanced diet should have no fear of problems in this area. Other symptoms of folate deficiency include a high frequency of irritability, forgetfulness, hostility and paranoid behavior. Fortunately, in Canada at least, folacin is added to flour and cereals. Be careful, though. Large supplements of folic acid can hide symptoms of pernicious anemia or vitamin B 12 deficiency. Unbeknownst to the supplement taker, this condition could be proceeding dangerously, undetected because of the folic acid. So, as with any other supplement, don't overdo it.

The plot thickens still as research indicates that a low folic acid intake might be responsible for elevated levels of a substance called homocysteine, which may in turn lead to atherosclerosis. As it turns out, it might not be the presence of fat in your diet that's a problem, but rather the absence of fruits and vegetables with their high level of folic acid. So, no matter your sex or age, make sure that you get at least five servings of these foods daily.

How best to define 'natural'

The subject was child abuse. Not a topic one would normally chose to start off a coffee klatch, but nonetheless...topical. One of the more fanatical in the group said that she would charge with child abuse anyone that fed their child sugar...any sugar at all. When asked to expound on the harm likely to befall a child with a moderate amount of sugar in the diet she replied that she didn't know exactly, but it was 'bad' for you and wasn't 'natural'. Another proffered the argument that anyone who didn't follow Canada's Food Guide in the care and feeding of her child was being abusive. Now hold on! The friendly conversation pretty soon disintegrated into a wild argument about the parents' rights to feed a child anything they want (except poison) as long as they don't withhold food from him/her for reasons of punishment or torture.

Coincidentally, I had recently been told that public health nurses were receiving an increasing number of requests for information on vegetarian diets in childhood. Apparently quite a few parents are raising their children in the vegetarian mold and are concerned about the nutritional status of their veggie-munching off-spring. Generally speaking the lacto-ovo vegetarian child is not at special nutritional risk, although iron adequacy is questionable for some. The problem comes when the child is on a strict or 'vegan' diet. On this regimen all animal products including eggs, milk and other dairy products are excluded resulting in the possibility of a deficiency in energy, vitamin D, vitamin B 12, calcium, iron, zinc, and the high-quality protein required for growth.

Among children in vegan families rickets has been observed frequently and dietary intake records have shown marginal intakes of calcium phosphorus and vitamin D in the children. Salt, of course, is not an animal food, but many vegans insist on only sea salt at their table...which is fine, except that this salt isn't iodized and hence the risk of goiter rises. Insufficient intake of the essential amino acids needed for protein synthesis (while achievable when complementary sources of protein are offered), as well as a plain old deficiency in calories can significantly hamper the growth of a child. This information is frequently met with the response that bigger isn't necessarily better. Possibly.

Studies have shown that the breast-fed infants of vegan mothers appear to develop at the average rate (although some have developed severe anemia due to B 12 deficiency when moms were long-term vegans), but lagged behind the growth of omnivorous children when their restricted solids were introduced. Most parents that are 'into' vegetarianism have read up on the subject and feel that they're qualified to judge the adequacy of their child's diet. Up to a point they probably are. The case of calcium and iron, however, is a good example of where they may err. Nutrient composition tables will show that most dark green leafy vegetables are good sources of these minerals. What they don't show is the high content of oxalic acid carried by these veggies. Normally oxalic acid doesn't pose too great a threat. When the diet is low in minerals form other sources, however, the propensity of oxalic acid to combine with these elements to form insoluble, unabsorbable salts becomes a problem.

Similarly, if the diet is very high in unrefined grains and unleavened bread, as is frequently the case (pita, especially whole grain, is very 'in') then the phytic acid contained therein may serve to rob the diet of available calcium and iron, not to mention zinc. Next, consider if you will, the logistical problem of delivering adequate energy to an individual when the vehicle is a high-bulk, low-calorie foodstuff like broccoli and the receptor is the tiny tummy of a four year old, or even 10 year old for that matter. It's just plain difficult to pack enough calories in with low energy foods...as any dieter will tell you. Unfortunately, there has been an increase in the number of adults belonging to groups that advocate extremely restrictive diets and also the avoidance of specific medical services like vaccinations. Concern for their children is increasing as well.

Soy what's new?

There's been a lot of buzz about soy products like tofu, tofurkey, soy juice and the like. Is all the ballyhoo warranted...and just what can these foods do for us that other, more traditional western foods can't? To begin with, let's get the terminology right. The juice or liquid expressed from soy beans, although often referred to as soy 'milk' is of course, not milk at all. As the old joke goes: "Did you ever try to milk a soy bean? The notion of this juice being 'milk' is largely promoted on the basis that it doesn't contain animal fat or lactose,it's of plant origin, and it contains components such as phytoestrogens that are suggested to be beneficial to health. But how does the juice compare to cow's milk in terms of its nutrient content?

Let's start with the protein. Raw soy bean contains a substance that keeps its protein from being digested in the human body...but in processing this substance is removed and we end up with a protein of relatively high quality. 'Relatively' is the key word here because the profile of essential amino acids (the building blocks of protein) still doesn't match the high quality of animal protein. The term 'high quality' refers to the amount and balance of essential amino acids in the protein under question and while the actual amount of protein in soy is impressive, the balance of its amino acids is off the mark. This isn't usually a serious problem, however, since in cultures where soy is routinely eaten, dietary patterns have developed whereby the amino acid picture is completed by other protein foods in the diet. What it's lacking specifically is sufficient quantity of sulfur-containing amino acids.

Well then, how about soy's calcium content? Soy is actually quite low in calcium, but some of the tofus (soy bean cakes) are 'set' with calcium, and many of the soy beverages have calcium added as well. Unfortunately, soy contains phytic acid, a substance that hampers the body's absorption of several minerals including iron, zinc and calcium. Because of these mineral problems there has been some concern expressed about the calcium status of children raised on soy-based drinks and the impact on bone health. In addition, some of the calcium added to the soy drinks remains as 'sludge' in the bottom of the container.

One of the popular uses of soy products has been as a way of avoiding milk protein allergy. As it turns out, research has shown that a lot of babies who develop an allergy to cow's milk proteins will also be allergic to soy-based formulas. For such infants...in fact for all infants...breast feeding is the best choice, but when that is not possible and milk/soy allergy is a concern, the only reliable alternative formulas are ones based on fully hydrolysed milk protein.

And then we have the potential role of soy foods in dealing with certain symptoms of menopause. Anything's possible, but right now the jury's still out...largely because the alleged active ingredients of soy (isoflavones) are so greatly reduced in being transformed into tofu and soy beverage. On a different topic concerning soy foods, it's often claimed that consumption of these products will lower serum cholesterol levels, but this has only been seen in people who had very high cholesterol levels to begin with.

In a nutshell then, soy foods are obviously nutritious; many cultures have thrived on them. These cultures, however, have a different set of genes and different food patterns than the typical westerner. Whether they can deliver the same nutritional wallop we've come to expect in our traditional diet remains to be seen.

Irish Stew

I've been stewing over something since the book 'Angela's Ashes' became so popular quite a few years ago. My problem is this: if Frank McCourt (the author) was so badly nourished as a child, how did he grow into such an intelligent, literate man? I mean, every nutrition text book will tell you that if a child is poorly fed, then his mental and physical development will be seriously impaired...the worse the diet, the greater the impairment. To hear McCourt tell it (or read McCourt write it) his childhood subsistence diet consisted mostly of tea and bread with some potatoes thrown in if he was lucky. So I'm thinking it was the potatoes that did the trick.

For openers, let's consider the potato's nutrient content. While some people have swallowed the myth that once a potato is peeled it loses all its nutrients, it is true that the more they're aggravated (chopped up, drowned, over-cooked, boiled in oil and bludgeoned) the fewer B vitamins and vitamin C they'll deliver. Baking in their jackets preserves more nutrients, but for people who hate the skins, nude potatoes still pack a nutritional wallop if the peel is only removed after cooking. In any discussion of dietary potassium, you know who gets all the glory...bananas and oranges. Not a word about the potato (or milk either, for that matter), which contains more potassium than either of those foods, and is a good source of magnmesium and phosphorus with almost no sodium. From a nutritional point of view the worst cooking offence is to cut them up into small pieces, drown them in water and cook for an excessively long period of time. The next greatest offence is to under-value the importance of the spud. Other sources of carbohydrate or starch have recently tried to push the potato off the dinner plate; big mistake. Compared to potatoes, white rice and white pasta are definitely small potatoes. The sweet potato is an even bigger winner, nutritionally speaking, but that's for another day.

Meanwhile, back at Angela's Ashes (and I hear that Mr. McCourt is not currently enjoying good health) a plate of Irish stew along with some whole grain bread and a glass of milk will not only cover the four food groups, it's the essence of comfort food. As winter has us in its icy grip, a little comfort is what we need right now. If you have a slow cooker you can put all the stew's ingredients in it in the morning, and come dinner time, after doing battle with the crowds out Christmas shopping there will be a big batch of comfort. Gourmet dining might be fun and exciting, but for down-to-earth nutrition nothing works better than simply prepared foods of years gone by. Remember that good nutrition depends on a balanced diet with lots of variety...nutrients delivered by real food, not supplements.

Fat is not a four-letter word

With all that's been written about fat and how to lose it, as well as why to lose it, very little attention has been given to the attitudes of society toward people who have fat to spare...and to lose. Most everyone will say that the chief, if not the only, good reason for losing fat is to safeguard one's health, but the bottom line is that 99.9 percent of over-fat people want to shed their excess baggage because of image. They just want to look good--or better. Not only do they want to look good for their own self-esteem, but also because of the knowledge that excess fat puts them at a distinct disadvantage in their personal and professional lives. Given that all health professionals would like to see everyone at their 'healthy' weight, the fact is that for many this remains an elusive goal...especially with the holiday season upon us. How does this 'failure to lose' affect them and the attitudes of those with whom they live and work?

A potential health hazard for many over-fat people, but one that isn't well studied, results from the discrimination, prejudice and exploitation they often experience. For example, some health professionals might be inclined, even subconsciously, to disparage their overweight clients, seeing their failure to slim down as a sign of unwillingness to cooperate with recommendations intended for their own good. To the extent that obese people are stigmatized as 'bad' or 'uncooperative' patients, unsympathetic treatment could result in less than optimum health care.

Overweight people can encounter prejudice in employment and school admissions.One study has shown that an excessively fat person is seen as a less desirable employee...even if he or she is acknowledged to have the same ability as a person of normal or average body fat. Women seem to be slightly more vulnerable to this kind of discrimination than men. Negative attitudes toward the obese are very commonly expressed, but are almost never met with the same kind of outrage or indignation that would greet a racial or sexist slur. This most definitely can play on a person's own self image; in fact, would-be fat losers often refer to a dietary lapse with the phrase "I was bad", as though food choices somehow reflect their moral worth.

One can quibble over the semantics of fatness as an illness, a condition, a disease, an addiction. No matter the cause--hormonal, metabolic, excessive consumption--I doubt anyone wakes up one day with the thought "Gee, I'd like to be fat". While they're doing their level best to slim down, let the rest of us lighten up.

What you see and what you get

A while back I attended a meeting of a very prestigious Canadian nutrition organization and when lunch was served I noted that the only beverages offered (other than tea and coffee) were juice and water. I noted it simply because breakfast had also been a milkless affair and one of the two food groups that Canadians routinely under-consume is the milk/milk product group...small wonder when even a nutrition organization doesn't include it in its menus. Anyway, having had my quota of fruit juice for the day, I opted for the bottled water thinking as I did, how amazed my young-dietitian self would have been to be told that someday people would actually pay for water in a bottle. Never mind how trendy and cool it would be to be seen carrying the stuff around in all manner of places.

So, you can imagine my surprise when, on lifting the glass to my lips, I discover I'm not drinking water at all...I'm drinking pop! I quickly check the ingredient list and sure enough there it is, all the regular stuff that's in regular pop (soda to those south of the border). You know: carbonated water, various forms of sugar, sodium benzoate, citric acid...the usual. So how was I fooled into thinking it was water? As far as I can tell, by one way only: the shape of the bottle. It looked like the bottles that the fizzy waters come in and I hadn't checked the label for the actual name of the product. So I quickly looked to see how this particular beverage was identified, mindful of the fact that a can of cola doesn't actually say 'pop' or 'soda' on the label...some products need no introduction. But this stuff did identify itself...it was a (are you ready?) sparkling 'refresher'.

What a relief to parents who might feel guilty about giving their kids pop with meals instead of milk or juice. They're not...they're giving them a 'refresher'. What a con! And speaking of con jobs, the same nutritional slight-of-hand is occurring as I mentioned yesterday, when the term 'vegetable oil shortening' is used instead of 'hydrogenated vegetable oil'.

Speaking of beverages reminds me of the time, way back when, a Minister of Agriculture declared that Canadians should stop relying on orange juice for their vitamin C and get it instead from Canadian grape juice instead. Great move, especially if a large proportion of one's constituency is in the southern Ontario grape belt, but a tad off the mark. Grape juice has virtually no vitamin C, unless the bottler decides to add it, but at the time I had no end of clients telling me that they were getting their vitamin C from grapes because of what the Minister had said.

It's hard to know what to believe about nutrition these days. When in doubt, read the label...then ask a registered dietitian.

Hidden facts and hidden meanings

I have frequently cautioned people about misleading terminology on ingredient labels, citing as an example the use of the term 'vegetable oil shortening' instead of 'hydrogenated vegetable oil'. The problem is that the process that gives us shortening (or hydrogenated oil) also produces trans fatty acids (I do know that trans should be italicized, but when I click on the icon for italics what appears is ; being a techno-dope, I have no idea what this means)...so please assume that whenever you see the word 'trans', it's in italics! The problem with trans fatty acids, as I'm sure you've read elsewhere, is that they cause an increase in the 'bad' cholesterol (LDL cholesterol) and a decrease in the 'good' cholesterol (HDL). This is a double-whammy effect that spells trouble for the heart.

Shortenings and hard margarines (even some soft ones) are made the same way: hydrogen molecules are added to liquid oils in order to change them into semi-solids. They're partially hydrogenated because if they were fully hydrogenated they'd be as hard as bullets. Partially hydrogenated oils like margarine and shortening were once considered desirable because they have a consistency like butter, yet contain few saturated fatty acids. In addition, they keep longer than liquid oils (which are more readily oxidized and develop rancidity) and add texture to baked goods. In fact, for many people, the biggest source of trans fatty acids has been cakes, cookies and crackers made with margarine or shortening. Trans fatty acids are also present in french fries, fish sticks and deep-fried foods. Now we have labels that will identify the trans fat content of foods bought in the supermarket, but in a restaurant, you're pretty much on your own.

So what's the problem? The problem is that we're wallowing in trans fatty acids--not just the margarine and shortening you use in your own cooking and baking, but the stuff that you eat in restaurants. If you look in your cupboard and check the ingredient list on your crackers and cookies, except for the ones that brag 'no trans fats', I'll bet you dollars to doughnuts (another source of trans fatty acids) that the second ingredient is vegetable oil shortening, or hydrogenated vegetable oil. Adding insult to injury, in cases where the trans fats have been taken out, they've been replaced with high omega-6 vegetable oils.

Next time you're in a mall at a food kiosk, have a look at what's on people's trays. Nine times out of ten, there'll be something deep-fried: chicken, pastries, french fries and the like. There's nothing wrong with the occasional consumption of these foods, but many people have them on a daily basis and, irony of ironies, the beverage that accompanies them is usually a diet drink.

On a related issue I recently came across another bit of nutritional chicanery. Picking up a box of ready-to-eat cereal (just add water), I glanced, as I normally do, at the ingredient list. Right after 'organic oat flakes' came organic 'unrefined evaporated cane juice'. Now what do you suppose evaporated cane juice is? Near as I can figure, it must be sugar. They just don't want to call it that. Leaving aside my feelings about so-called organic packaged goods, I find it offensive in the extreme that a manufacturer should try and disguise what's in their product. There's nothing wrong with a bit of sugar added to a food to make it taste better; plain old oats just don't go down that easily. But for goodness sake, let's call it what it is. Just call a spade a spade!

Let the buyer beware

Probably the first person to use the term "caveat emptor" was a salesman on "Honest Flavius' Used Chariot Lot" in response to some poor schlemiel standing there with a broken axle from his chariot. P.T. Barnum, of course, gave the definitive summation of the situation with "There's a sucker born every minute...and two to take him". Now don't get me wrong. This isn't going to be another tirade against hucksters. I'm as capitalistic as the next person and applaud everyone's right to make a quick buck, or a quick multi-million bucks as is the case with the founders of many get-slim-quick schemes. I also applaud people's right to know the truth, especially when that truth affects both their health and their pocketbook. Having been apprised of the facts, they can then do what they jolly well like.

The author Rebecca West once said "It unfortunately happens that the troubled times which produce an appetite for new ideas are the least propitious for clear thinking". Right on, Rebecca...and you should see some of the fuzzy thinking that today's appetite for super nutrition is producing. I find it hard to believe that one would need specialized training as a dietitian to be doubled up with laughter at some of the claims being made for disease prevention via special foods or potions. Of course, dietitians are becoming so weary of discussing the latest nutrition fad that their senses of humour are being stretched a tad thin. An occupational hazard, I suppose.

Time and space won't permit me to list all the funnies but I'll try and cover a few of the best. For openers, how about the phrase used in promoting many products: "The amazing magic of natural...(you name it)". Magic, as we know, involves trickery, slight of hand, and the art of illusion. If you believe in magic, I have some great swamp land in Florida...full of all kinds of natural stuff.

Many of the manufacturers of 'nutrition' products claim that their product will 'cleanse the system'. It's amazing to me that so many systems are in need of 'cleansing'...people seem obsessed with the notion of ridding their bodies of alleged poisons. Cleansing their wallets may be more to the point. Not quite so funny, but nonetheless misleading, are advertisements for calcium supplements. Granted, if there are no milk or milk products in your diet, then calcium tablets will definitely help fill the calcium gap. The deceit comes with the notion that calcium alone, or even calcium plus vitamin D are all that are needed to avoid osteoporosis. This, unfortunately, is not the case. Calcium can't do it alone...aside from the fact that susceptibility to the brittle bone disease depends a lot on the wisdom you used in choosing your parents. In other words, genetics has a lot to do with one's vulnerability. Other than that, and aside from the need to participate in bone-strengthening activity, there are many nutrients that contribute to bone health...and they all just happen to be found in milk and milk products. Nutrients like protein, magnesium, biotin and vitamin K.

Another bit of hilarity struck me one evening in a hotel room. Having arrived without dinner and not wanting to have a heavy meal just before bed-time, I looked at the mini-bar as it promised "healthy cookies". The cookie in question was oatmeal and raisin (everybody knows how healthful such a cookie must be). Well, this particular offering came in at 420 calories for just one cookie. True, it was a big cookie, but 420 calories for one sweet seemed too rich for me...I went to bed hungry.

And on the subject of misleading advertising, can someone please explain to me how the cosmetic industry can get away with such outlandish claims? Though their advertising is full of such weasel words as "may" and "might", they very often claim that "research has shown a 75 percent reduced perception of fine lines". What a crock! Caveat emptor indeed.